Stevie Beck, Greg Brown, Dave Moore, Robin and Linda Williams, Butch Thompson, Pop Wagner.
[undocumented]
Chatterbox Cafe Jack's Auto Repair Powdermilk Biscuits Sidetrack Tap
It's nice to be here in Ames, Iowa. Today, though I must admit it's a little bit strange to be here on a day which is homecoming. For those of us who are not from here and have never been here before, and so really are not coming back to anything, we have no real reason to be here, we're just stopping on our way to someplace else, but.... It's often that way- strange, I mean-- going back to Lake Wobegon, Minnesota, which is where I'm from. At least I stopped there for a while. It was a long stop. Though I didn't know, I think that I was going to leave Lake Wobegon from the moment I was old enough to realize where I was. I knew that I was in a quiet town where things stop pretty regularly. Things stop more often than they ever get started- which according to the law of physics, I guess mean it's sort of gradually coming towards a complete halt. We've not seen that yet, but we may soon. Especially in this fall weather as the cooler weather comes on, it's such good sleeping weather, you know. People been dropping off all over town out there- just case after case of it.
People sit in the Sidetrack Tap for a couple hours and take about 20 steps and just get through the door and stagger and fall. It's because of the stools- the bar stools are in the Sidetrack Tap- they have a kind of a high leading edge on them and they kind of cut you right in the back of your leg- your feet your legs go to sleep is what happens. I know it's happened to me many times. But that's at night.
Good heavens, down to Chatterbox Cafe here this last Tuesday it was a couple of the old boys fell asleep over breakfast- just tipped over, went face first into the waffles. Dorothy heard a kind of a snorkeling noise. Snoring in the syrup. Well, they were embarrassed I'll tell you- humiliated. Woke up with egg on their faces in a manner of speaking.
And in church too down here today at Our Lady of Perpetual Responsibility here this last Sunday. And it wasn't the early mass, iIt was the 10:00 o'clock service, it seemed like about half of the congregation was out- was asleep or on the verge of it. And Mr. Deener was the worst of it- sitting in the front row where everybody could see and hear him. He was up there cutting lumber from the curia right through the last dominus of bescom. Snoring away the worst of it was he was- he has a tendency- which his neighbors know- about of hollering out in his sleep from time to time. As if somebody were after him. And somebody was. Father Emil was making some rather pointed comments in his direction about the lame and the dumb and other things. Didn't seem to effect him and people were afraid to go down and poke him for fear that he was in a dream in which he was standing off attackers and that if he were awakened suddenly he would figure that the awaker was part of the attackers, which is often the case with revival, isn't it? We are attacked.
It was not a worship service, I'll tell you, as Scripture intended. When it came to communion, I’ll tell you, Father Emil may as well have handed out poker chips for all the people were aware of it. Though of course we do believe that the communion of the faithful with our risen Lord- it has a quickening effect on us, and on our spirits. It's just that it doesn't often seem to be the case in Lake Wobegon. And more revivalists and reformers come through there and try to roust people up a little bit, get ‘em to move, get ‘em to live a little bit and without much success. I was one of them.
I came home to Lake Wobegon from college where I had read a number of books, I'm not sure if you've ever heard of this, on the Haughian philosophy it was after Gilbert Haughy, who was very big man in Speech communications at that time- and who had a theory about the connection between speech and thought. He believed that slow talking stops the mind. You see.
He believes that the mind has unlimited capabilities, is imponderable and has phenomenal capabilities for thought and imagination. But that slow talking slows it down. You see, it gets backed up.It's like if you put a whole big wad of tissue down the drain and the drain gets stopped up and the sink backs up and you don't dare run the water. You see it's the same way with your mind is the way that he figures is it.
If you if you talk fast, you see if you- if you get your thoughts out quickly that it stimulates the mind to to uh... to think of more things and to- your train of thought keeps going. It makes sense. It made a lot of sense to me then because I was a faster talker then then I am now. Actually the rate at which I'm talking now it seems very fast to me. You see I- you catch me off the radio show I mean I, I talk very slowly, but I realize that to a lot of you who are recent college graduates, probably this seems like very slow talking, and I we find that when we do shows and colleges such as this one, we have a problem, I do, with people walking out during the show. Who are not sure if I have stopped for a comma or a period or the end of a paragraph, or if the show is over. And they don't have time to wait around for it.
Well, as I say, I tried to, I did my best up there but you try and be a fast talker in a group of slow talkers. You just gradually slow down.
Over the years... I’m thinking about the Inqvist boy now- Harlan's boy, the one after Glen... Garland- he's taken up running now in Lake Wobegon, trying to get other people interested in it, but nobody's having anything to do with it. He's the only person in town, I think, over the age of 18 who runs, you know for, for exercise. People see him out there running- the first time they saw him out there running they got awfully curious about where he was going. Got into their cars and followed him. Kind of surprised when he turned around, and came right back home. And they just figured, I guess that why run so fast to get back to where you were in the first place? You could have gotten there faster if you hadn't gone.
Anyway, it's homecoming up in Lake Wobegon this weekend too, and I just remind you of that, all of you Lake Wobegon natives- the Lake Wobegon Leonards played Millet in six-man football here on Friday night. They lost, but the celebration goes on- there's a dance tonight at the Sons of Knute Lodge and if you do stop up for Homecoming and I just ask that you stop first at the Chamber of Commerce visitors Information Center, which is which is Eva and Carl's camper which is parked generally on Main Street, unless they're off someplace, but if they are, they'll be back soon. They'd like to know your name and how long you been away and also how long you plan on staying.
And that's the news, what I can think of in Lake Wobegon, Minnesota, where all the women are strong and all the men are good looking and all the children are above average. Every one.
Des Moines Tribune Nov 6 1980 Des Moines Tribune Oct 2 1980
Photos by Larry May. 1980.10.10 Paducah Sun / 1980.10.02 Des Moines Tribune / Audio of the News available as a digital download.
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